Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Well, it's Boxing Day in America - Did You Buy Your Politician a Gift Today?

Ah, I love the smell of off-season primaries in the morning! This year, we get a special treat - rabble-rousing stuff of the earth tea baggers funded by Massey Coal! Yep, this "grass root" movement is actually an open-pit movement funded by dirty coal. Turns out the fat cat what owns Massey Coal doesn't like too many (read: any) guvmint regulations, cuz, well, it get's his profit hungry panties in a bunch. So, cuz he can't get his way with the current (read: non-Bush) guvmint, well, he's gonna buy a guvmint that suits his personal needs. And, he's gonna fool a bunch of easy to fool fools into foolishly believing THEY are the one's in charge! Wow, talk about an excellent conspiracy of dunces.

Now, I'd like to re-shape the guvmint to MY own liking as much as the next billionaire, (Oh, you didn't know?) but I just don't think that was part of the "original Intent" of the foundling fathers for their newly founded fatherland. (ahem.) But why should that matter? This is Amuricah - land of the foreclosure, home of the knave, where the Almighty Profit has gone fourth and ten with seconds to go, and has plans to keep all of us, (no, not you tea baggers, uh-uh) in debt up to our third eyes for all eternity. And lo! he spaketh unto them and led them all into the wilderness of the suburbs, and made them glad to be consumers of consumption, he sayeth unto the Lard! You see how easy it is to cite scripture when your rapture is about to rupture?

Look, we KNOW you chumps just cannot be honest about your real feelings, cuz that would mean you'd have to actually own up to being the frightened white sheep that you truly are. I mean, when you yahoos say something that is clearly racist, ya'll get all fired up stoopid complaining how you are being "maligned" (look it up) just like, oh, how does Glenny-Boy put it? The Nazis are coming, the Nazis are coming!! And look! They just happen to be a mixed set, not one uniformly god-given color like us! And to have to face the trooth of yourself, well, that sends so many mixed signals to the little ones, who so look up to ya'll for guidance of their missiles. Who knows - they might even end up being aimed (horrors!) right back at you.

Ooh, messy.

Well, we'll certainly know better tomorrow whether the 'baggers are going to succeed in pulling down the entire Republican Party and drive it well over the wrong wing cliff. I certainly am cheering for ya'll. 'Cuz there is one thing I am dead certain of - Amurica tends to shy away from the extremes, regardless what side of the Great Divide they may fall. Because fall they will.

Which, as Martha likes to say, is a good thing! Maybe then, we can actually get something done in this country.

Toodles, ya'll!

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