"Honest, I never realized my Bazooka Joe could even GET that big. I wasn't even chokin' or nothin'! My bad - sorry!!
On more serious fronts, has anybody else been noticing how men's underwear is getting thinner all the time? I mean, what do they expect us to do to hide the padding?
And what's up with this obesity campaign? I thought the whole point of being a good US citizen was being a better-than-average consumer. What a better way to both consume AND store vast quantities, without ever leaving the mall?
Don't you just love all these global climate change deniers? They are now pointing out that, due to all the snow the country got this year, that's complete proof that Al Gore is a block-head. So what are they going to say this summer, when the heat releases ten trillion mosquitoes? "Oh, Old Al musta planted 'em?" Hey, where was he keeping them, I wonder? Musta been up Old Rusty Limpburger's nose. Yep, makes sense to me!
Like Scoop used ta say - if ya don't like the noose, go out and hang one of your own!