Friday, December 25, 2009

Happy Non-Denominational Holiday and Seersucker Sale, 3 Days Only!

Yeah, yeah, happy ho-ho and all that "stuff." I don't subscribe to any particular "thang" myself, but I have the same attitude toward one as I do toward all: please, PLEASE, keep yer peanut brickle off my plate!!! Now, I respect yer right to believe whatever, so long as you don't try to slap in onto my plate, ya dig? But I do take exception to folks who think they have some right, nay, DUTY, to try and cram their own convictions down other people's throats - I don't care if they are Christian, Muslim, Jew, Hindu, Republican, or Pailinoid - ain't mine, don't want it, and I'll pee on yer dog if ya keep tryin' ta shove it down mine!

That said, got a nice pair of fuzzy slippers from the spouse today, bit too warm for up here in Nome, but what the hey, it's the thought and all that. Got the spouse one o' them iPodsicles, nice to have something to listen to whilst takin' an ice shower. And new mukluks fer the sled poodle, plus earwarmers fer the poochaneese fighting cod fish. Got the gift certificate to Joey Lumperman's last election defeat, comin' up next year down there in the Lowered Expectations 48. And the ho-ho-lidays would not be complete without the nice gift from Uncle Ralphy, six and a half gallons of Cuban rum and one straw. Gotta stay warm up here, as She-Rah, the Moose Queen, has prohibited any hint of global warming hereabouts.

Reminds me - gotta get out the sno-blower. Got moose totally coverin' the drive. Makes it really hard to keep yer eyes on those damn Ruskies.You know how they always want to steal our holiday cheer.

Toodles. And don't forget to appreciate that wonderful holiday sound, blasting from malls all over Amurica -

Ka-Ching, ka-ching, bada bing!

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