Sunday, November 29, 2009

"New Moon" Reveals The Truth About Climate Change Hoax!!


In the new film, New Moon, a conversation secretly filmed between three werewolves was inadvertantly put into the final edit by "an anonymous source." In the part of the film where one werewolf tells the others its "noticing how we seem to be molting pretty much at the same rate as ten years back."  Another gives a dog-like laugh and replies, "Yeah, those so-called climate change guys are just trying to make us all believe we have to migrate South earlier if we hope to retain our luxurious pelts." This apparently brought on such a bout of wolf-giggles that the next cut to the un-changed werewolf's excessive abs seems, well, faked, somehow.

Joe Bob McGillicuddy, of the "Science Wants To Steal Our Soul" organization, who seek to debunk anything with a difficult explanation as "science swill," and "horse puckey even my Gramma woulda pee'd on," said his group has had its largest fund-raising day ever after these revelations came to the local Cineplex. "We know the truth when it bites us in the ass, and we intend to show the rest of the world what that looks like," he exclaimed. "And we hope to have She-Rah Pail-In down here soon to sell her book, and to make a speech about how they shoot werewolves from helicopters up there in Alaska, in between watching them Ruskies from her front stoop."

Officials from the American Academy of Sciences were reported to have sprayed milk out of their noses when they heard the initial reports from McGillicuddy's group broadcast on Al Jezzera. One scientist was seen scratching his butt and making monkey noises before rolling his eyes and going back to work. No official response has been made by the Academy.

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